The Top 5 Myths About Purpose (and Setting the Record Straight)

Hesitant about trying to bring more purpose into your life? Chances are you’re making one of these (false) assumptions about what it means to find ⁠— and live ⁠— your purpose.

Given that I talk a lot about purpose — how to build a purpose-based business, how to infuse your life with more purpose, etc. — I get a lot of questions about the topic. And through those questions, I often hear genuine concerns from people who want to bring more purpose into their lives but have reservations based on specific assumptions they’ve made about purposeful living. So I thought it would be helpful to address the most common concerns in one handy-dandy article. Here are the five top myths about purpose.

Myth 1

I need to wait for some sort of “revelation” or to find my “one true calling” to find my purpose. 

A common societal narrative that we often see in books, movies, and articles is about the person who was walking around and then suddenly had an “a-ha!” moment where they were struck with a complete understanding of what they are supposed to do with their life — or they were just born knowing their life’s purpose from day one and have been working toward it their entire life. While these stories are absolutely wonderful and serve the purpose of inspiring people all around the world to follow their dreams, they’ve also had the unfortunate side effect of convincing countless others that if they aren’t born knowing what their purpose is or if they don’t have an “a-ha” moment, they will never find their one true calling. While purpose can feel like a revelation, it can also be intentionally developed. You actually can work to discover your purpose. It just takes some intentionality and desire to do so, but if you haven’t had that Eureka moment in your life, fear not. You can still have a purposeful life, my friend. 

Myth 2

My purposeful life doesn’t look like someone else’s, therefore it’s wrong.

I have just recently (March 2020) transitioned away from the social enterprise that I co-founded and led for six years. One of my wonderful friends is also in transition after co-founding and leading an international social enterprise. Concurrently, we’ve both found ourselves in a period of transition, searching for how we can manifest our purpose in our next chapter. The other day, she told me that she feels like she is not doing it “right” because it doesn’t look the way that I am doing it. I responded with one of my favorite quotes: “Comparison is the thief of joy.” No two purposes look alike. No two journeys look alike. No two lives look alike. Your journey to purpose is yours and yours alone. So if you ever find yourself wondering if you’re doing it “right,” the answer is always a resounding “Yes!” Because you’re doing it your way. 

Myth 3

To lead a purposeful life, I will have to uproot my life and make drastic changes. 

While we often hear stories of people who found their one true purpose and then moved to another country to start an NGO to positively impact their worthy cause, these are usually the exception to the rule. You can find purpose in your life in the smallest of ways. You can take baby steps and make subtle changes here and there that will start you on your way to bringing more purpose in your life. And as you become more comfortable with the small things, you can graduate to making bigger choices. It all depends on your comfort level, so don’t shy away from purpose because you’re scared of change. 

Myth 4

Once I find my purpose, I can only have one and I am stuck with it for the rest of my life. 

Again, while we often hear about people who have identified their life’s purpose and work on it from sun-up to sun-down their entire life, this doesn’t have to be how it looks for everyone. I have changed the ways in which I express my purpose multiple, multiple times. My purpose has changed and evolved based on my own life circumstances, the political climate, and all sorts of other external and internal factors. So if you’re concerned about finding a purpose and then losing your passion for it, that’s totally fine! Your purpose can grow and evolve with you as your life progresses. 

Myth 5

Living a purposeful life should feel hard and like I am consistently sacrificing myself in the name of my cause. 

I often hear people conflate living a purposeful life with volunteering for a cause they feel obligated to or sacrificing everything and burning themself out in the name of a cause they genuinely care about. That’s not what I’m talking about when I talk about a purposeful life. My definition of a purposeful life is, “Using your unique gifts to make consistent contributions toward a worthy cause(s) while intentionally building a life that you love.” When you’re living on purpose, it should make you feel good. It’s working to find those sweet spots where you feel like you’re making contributions to a cause that you really care about while using skills that you are good at and that you really enjoy doing, all while consistently focusing on building a life that you love where you are not burned out, stressed out, or overextending. And while that might sound too good to be true, I am telling you: It’s possible.

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