What Brené Brown and My High School Homecoming Humiliation Taught Me About Launching My Business

When I was in high school, I was nominated to be homecoming queen. In my school’s infinite wisdom, they forced the three finalists for homecoming queen and king to march out onto the football field at halftime of the game to hear the announcement of the winners. So, as a profoundly insecure 17-year-old girl, I had to stand in front of a crowd and be judged on whether or not I won a popularity contest. Not only did I not win, but the winners ended up being — and this is true — my best friend and my boyfriend. So, I had to stand on the field in front of hundreds of my peers and try to hold my sh*t together while I literally watched the school official slowly put jeweled plastic crowns on the heads of my bestie and my boyfriend. 

While they stood together and waved at the crowd, I attempted to smile while my soul imploded. Time stood still. The drama of this moment for high-school Meghan cannot be overstated. Not only did my classmates not vote for me, they intentionally voted that my best friend and my boyfriend should be together. Good stuff. I kept painfully smiling through my tears as I blubbered to my friend, “I’m just SO happy for you! No, really, just sooooo happy. This is all just so great.”  

So, when I had the idea to do online courses and my team told me that not only should I be front and center as the face of the whole company (under my name, no less), but that I actually had to do social media for my own brand, I think this was a live shot of my reaction…..

High-school Meghan was summoned from the pit of my shattered soul, 20 years later while I lied through my teeth and said, “This is all just soooo great!” 

Social media has always felt like a huge popularity contest, where you have to put yourself out there only to be publicly judged by how many “likes” you get (#Flashback). You can check the records — we literally had to set up an Instagram page for me in June of 2020 (yes, 2020) because I just couldn’t do it even when people had urged me to for the previous six years as a public speaker and the CEO of Conscious Company Media. 

Even as my team has supported me (beautifully, I might add) in wading into the social media cesspool, I will be honest that I pretty much hated it. Every time they asked me to write a caption, I jokingly rolled my eyes, but the truth of the matter is that I am just terrified of being judged. I hate putting my heart and soul into things only to offer it to the world and have them tell me if they “like” me and my work by hitting a thumbs-up button. It all just feels deeply vulnerable and uncomfortable. 

Add on top of that that I am now going to be the face, voice, and spokesperson for my own brand, under my own name, where I teach all the things, write all the things, and have photos taken of me to try to get people to buy what I am offering and just, blerg! I am officially 17 years old again, standing on the 50 yard line. 

From that deep place of discomfort, and from having a week filled with self-doubt prior to our launch, I forced myself to go on a walk and listen to the vulnerability guru, Brené Brown. Her first podcast entitled FFT (which stands for “F*cking First Time,” like when you’re trying something new and have no idea what you’re doing) brought up three unbelievably helpful concepts that have set the foundation for me as I embark on launching my own brand (and doing social media along the way).  

Stay Authentic To Who You Truly Are

When we are uncomfortable, we often look around to see how everyone else is doing it. We try to emulate people who are doing the thing we’re trying to do well and lose ourselves and our authenticity along the way. This rings so true for me. From the start, I’ve been trying to make myself look and sound like other super-successful online personalities. So, I made a commitment to just show up in all my cursing, insecure, honest Meghan glory. As soon as I made the decision to just be me and do it my way, things have felt so much better and the response has been incredible. 

Release Expectations

Brené  (because of course she and I are on a first-name basis at this point) mentioned one of her favorite quotes: “Expectations are just resentments waiting to happen.” When we launch a new business, it’s ingrained in us to set expectations. We have to create projections where we completely make up expectations on how well we’re going to do, and then we doggedly chase those expectations and feel terrible when we don’t hit them. I think it’s one of the main reasons I’ve felt like running a business has been so incredibly hard up to this point — unmet expectations that bred resentment in all sorts of ways. So, for this new venture, I am throwing expectations to the wind. All I know is that I am going to do things that feel meaningful, fun, and in alignment with my purpose. 

Stand Strong In The Discomfort (And Know It’s Coming)

When we put ourselves out there in any way (whether it be for homecoming court, a social media post, or launching an entire new business), we are going to feel discomfort. To imagine that you can do something new and that it’s all going to feel great is simply ridiculous. So, expect the discomfort. Know it’s coming. True courage is about standing there while that discomfort washes over you, and holding strong. So, I am going to launch this business and keep posting on social media, even when (or especially when) it feels miserably uncomfortable. I owe it to that 17-year-old who stood in the middle of that field and forced a smile on her face, awash in her own humiliation. I now see just how courageous she was. 

17-year-old Meghan getting ready for homecoming.

And yes, I was the captain of the basketball team so naturally I was holding a basketball for these photos.